The strangest thing - Broads are tricky

While dreaming last night, I was going on about how the toilet in my house has backed up and that there is a wretched stench in my home whilst talking to a potential client. It was 3am when I woke and found Rip had crapped in the living room and my place smelled of shit. How that smell defined my dream is of interest to me. This means we can influence our dreams with real time sense manipulation. I'm sure this has been studied up on much and will have to further educate myself on the subject of transmutation of dreams. Something I've noticed about myself, that I'd like to publish here, is how every time I end a relationship with a girlfriend, no matter how sure I am about how unfit we are for each other, I question myself later. EVERY SINGLE TIME I end a relationship this occurs. What in the fuck is wrong with my subconscious, leading it to question decisions I make that I know are right. I know not why I do this but even today, I reached out to an ex who I was hoping would turn into a friend. This prospect is gone with the wind, but, why even reach out? Why do I give a fuck for these women who are toxic to me? There is something in me that sees my mother in these (essential) strangers. While inside I know there is no reason for contact, I go ahead and make it anyway. I need to learn that when I make a decision, I make it for good reason and to NEVER question myself. Intuition is the greatest indicator of truth yet I always question it. This is a lesson learnt. From here on out, when I make a decision, like concrete, it WILL remain firm. Never shall I question again. I think the effect of these actions of mine cause these chics heads to grow larger than they should.

“The only real valuable thing is intuition.” ~ Einstein