Saturday, March 31, 2007

Mornings On A Northern NY Farm

Delusions Of Self

So,I've been reading this book Called "Journey Of Souls"/ As you might guess it is about reincarnation. Its 100 past life regression case studies from the most respected Dr in this field. It truly is a great book. It cements the beliefs I have adopted about the world when I was ordered to read a certain book by someone. This was when I was 14. I didn't care much to read then what having many a-walls to spray paint on. My sponge was dry... I read this book in 2 days. This, was then a true feat for me. Anyway, I'm not gonna get into it. I can preach about the sheople herding religions and the deep contrast between all of them yet still people believing. Actually, I believe all religions will get you to "heaven" as long as their not satanistic. I just believe you gotta do the right thing. Be a good person. I would not dare to be another that mentions the billions killed because of feuds between religions. It is the individual person that needs to be judged. Any none racist (I guess) would say this. I do find it hard to not generalize though. But I can gratefully say a kind "brother" down in Harlem helped me to find the FDR today. I remember once being in Mexico and hating the mother fucking Mexicans after my phone disappearing in a restaurant. Later on that trip I met an old very hard working Mexican and his wife that seemed to be such great and gentle people. So back to this book, each of these 100 people under hypnosis tell of an extreme feeling of release once they die. They each tell of eerily similar events that occur after death. One told of looking down on his family while they were crying and distraught. He wished he can comfort them and tell them he's OK. They speak of a methodical order to things up there and claim we all have superior spirit guides that upon death help us reflect on our lives and learn . There is much to talk about here but I'm way too tired so let me get to the point. If one understood that our souls have lived verrry many lives as many diferent people. I would wonder how often, how quickly or even if ever a soul finds out what its true character is.

Thursday, March 29, 2007

Wednesday, March 28, 2007

Bloggers Block

I havent much to say these days. I have been working very hard @ trying to adjust to this new lifestyle I have set for myself. I spent 3 hours in some court room here upstate in a town called Saugerties. I was given a ticket for a traffic violation and had to go to court for it. There were a bunch of wannabe hoodlums there and it reminded me of this one time when I decided to amuse myself (which I do often when Im alone) by telling a kid passing in front of my car on some street next to my parents house in Brooklyn that "he dropped it" the kid looked down and then at me dumbfounded not understanding what I meant as he noticed he didnt drop anything. He asked what? I said your fucking pants. He like many of these dumb wanna be rappers was wearing his pants below his knees. I laughed hard as I drove off and loved that I can even while I was all alone. The judge I had the displeasure of meeting today was a smug bastard. He lowered my fine from what it should have been I guess because I was the only person there with my pants @ my waste. He did what he had to do but still I couldnt help but think of how great it would be to call him a mother fucker. I was saved the charge of contempt by a punk in handcuffs that didnt agree with the sentence given him and did it for me.

Thursday, March 22, 2007


Ive recently affirmed that my firey optimism is met mostly with critisim by most friends and even family. I worry not for there were many dreamers like me. I doubt wed have electricity if Mr Edison listed to those that called him a buffoon


I have got some freakin awesome pics to share. Today I worked on a 700 acre farm,the hours are from 5:30 to 8:30 in the morning and then i come back to the crib to work from 10-6 pm. I like this regimen and if the kind owner of the place allows me to stay I will love to gain the knowledge that I know he can provide. On the way up there my buddy Saber explained there is no sitting down and chatting with this guy because its only him and his nephew that raise, feed and milk 200 cows.Its quite an image seeing 200 cows lined together in a barn crapping, peeing and feeding in unison. Oh boy was he right, the only way you get to chatto this guy is while he is milking feeding grazing and doing wutever the F else he does. The cows give birth almost daily and so there are many calves running around mooing which i guess is the way infant cows cry. So Saber told me to stick my thumb in the mouth of one of these calves. Let me just say the expert suck job a calve can give makes me understand how Bin Laden can spend these longs years in caves screwing goats. I always liked animals but I recently found that I love them. This mihgt sound stupid to some but I think there is much to learn from animals. No worries just routine. No doubts about what might happen tomorrow. They live in peace and harmony. So I pay $1200 a month for this very nice secluded home in the town of Tannersville. Its 2 minutes from Hunter Mtn. I only signed a one month lease knowing I will find a nicer and bigger place with more acreage soon after I actually moved up here. So today on the way back from the farm I noticed a cool place for rent so as Saber and I drove past it I took the number and later came back to get a good look at it. As i was pulling up to the place I noticed A beautiful rustic but very large 5 bedroom house acrooss the street with a sign that said for sale house barn and 20 acres. I couldnt help myself but go and look at this property. It was exactly what I had pictured in my head when i first thought of moving up here 3 months ago. Fate and coincidence go hand in hand I think . Some guy pulls up with a big truck and eyeballs me apparantly because it was his house. It in fact was. Hes a cool country guy whos grandfather used to own the house, barn and property. I asked him if he would interested in renting it to me first and then I can consider buying it (which would do in a heart beat were they asking for a fair price. This place is awesome and 20 x bigger than my current place and I will only pay get this you cidiots $800 a month. Anyway to get to the jist of things so I can hit the sak and begin tomos regimen. I found a fucking dream property. One where I dont need to buid but can use the current barn for my aristocratic Bach and mozart listening goats. I am so glad to have found where I belong in this vast, confusing and misleading world.

I will update the pics I have taken recently upon my visit to brooklyn on thurs.

Tuesday, March 20, 2007

Why do wood peckers peck?

I dont know exactly what motivates me to write here. But then ive always been one that likes to tell stories and teach. My ex used to find it annoying. Blogging is "In Deuude". No, its just a always found it to be an intelligent thing to do. I remember buying at least 2 or 3 actual journals and writing in them for a few days and then like just about everything else i have/had i lose it. Google owns this blog and something tells me they will be around for many generations to come. I am waking at 5:30 in the morning to go with a friend named Saber (I call him saber tooth tiger) to his friends farm not too far from here. Saber is 62 and is extremely well learned. He agreed to let me use the acres he has up here to herd around and pasturize goat milk and we will make goat and other cheeses as well. From what I hear from friends in the produce bsiness there is a high demand for goat milk primarily but the cheese as well. I love animals and the outdoors appeals to me. Also I am going to add an artsy twist to it. All the livestock will be pampered and will never be given any pathogens making them organic. Ambient, classical yoga type music will be played for my goats all day. So they can live harmonuously and sway to Bach or Mozart. "Gillys Harmonorganic Goats Inc" lollll. Some rugged ass farmers might say I am a dreaming city boy that knows nothing of the work involved. Well to that I say this: For a couple of years I have worked with this luminescent bloodsucking monitor in my face like a fat lazy fuck. Wether one goes to the military, is raised by a preacher, or people that were born into conditions that left them no choice, they were disciplined. Discipline and responsibilty, for the many to whom it was never taught GO AND ATTAIN IT SOMEHOW. Thats the way I feel anyway. I do not mind doing it for just the work and the knowledge. My dads friend does exactly this high in the mountains in Jerusalem. Its abeautiful place and he has been doing it for 45 years. I am hoping to learn enough about spending a few weeks at the farm im going to tomo mng but if not I will spend a few weeks in a crash coarse goat farming lesson in jerusalem. Sometimes I think about what exactly I would tell someone if they acskded me what I am? I have questioned this for quite a while. I, for a while considered myself a no nonsense even cut throat entreupenuer. I remember when I was 15 I thought i was a punk ass dude that cant be fucked with. One thing that I have found about myself @ 15 and still now. And I am not gloating. I used to get jumped as a kid for this and aonce even sliced in the back by some kid that was peeved about me throwing his friend down the poolhall stairs. Ye, growing up in brooklyn brings with it many adventures. Including outrunning "minorities" daily at the park after playing wiht our new basket balls. Many a times I suited up only to find my bike had disapeared. One incident i wil never forget: Me, my brother and his friend hanging out in friend of the friends house. I was toying around with my new Haro Master stunt bike. I remember my father rode it all the way from the city where he works to our house in Brooklyn. It was a birthday gift. As i waited for them to come back some old greek guy pulled up next to me walked up and took my bike from right out of my hands. I was helples and 11 years old. 6 or 7 years ago I recognized this guy as the owner of a bicycle shop in the area. I have ever since promised myself I will throw a city corner trash can through the fuckers window one day. I care not even if i get caught. Justcice must be served and our penal system is governed by fruitcake lame asses that sit around and jerk off to pictures of little boys on the screen on their cherry wood oak desks. They smile with their ugly money-bred wives at events and lie straight to our faces about where our money is going and what is REALLLY going on. Let me ask you this: If these closet fag probably even sadistic senators, governors, priests, rabbis and whoever the fuck else conceal that their bonin lil boys supposedly working or worshiping after hours from their families friends and communities, do you think they wil have any problem ethically morally to lie straight to your face on television when theya re not even on leisure time as when their with family. Their act is practiced and proven when speaking publicly. Dont want to hassle my mind or yours any further with these damning truths. The jews, gypsies, gays and all german non aerians were fighting patriotically and dying for the sake of their land and country but their administration decided to slaughter them regardless. Well, I try to keep inconspicuous but its hard not to tell of these observations. I am an explorer and exploring no matter for what end result is going to remain who I am and who I will be. 75% of our government is corrupt so u know what? I will smoke my pot when I please I will drive as fast as I want as long as I feel its safe my guns will always remain loaded on my rack at all times in case anyone intrudes on my lifestyle.

All presidents future past and present are actors that dont play on screen. Obama seems sincere but who the fuck is gonna vote for a guys name that rhymes with osama? I will cut off my left pinky if the blues choose obama bin dreamin over clinton to run for the dems. Nixon was a great actor and it came out of no where when he was found to be a thief liar. Bush though is a terrible actor and only but really only by way of inherintance did he steal the presidency. Its abolufuckinglutely crazy how what ever official moves his lips in a ngatvive tone using the bush name they are suddenly fired or disciplined/punished in some way. Twas sweet to mix work with the singing birds in this 2 acre forest.

Sunday, March 18, 2007


Try to picture yourself on a train moving at 200 miles per hour looking out of the window. You are trying to focus on what seems to be interesting scenes but is only a blur. You are hurriedly rolling by exquisitely beautiful things but havent the time to pay any mind to them. This is how I believe my life has been for the past 10-15 years. Great and bountiful delights I have regretfully let pass unnoticed. I admit I was one of the many rats that race through New York City. My distaste to this hurried lifestyle has been evident to my friends and family for a couple of years now. Dont get me wrong, this city possesses some fantastic attributes that I feel will bring me back often. I can definitely say it has etched itself into who I am and probably will be some part of me forever. However, I always considered it (even when I was very young) a city to come and visit. One where you come, you stay, you handle whatever business you must and you return to a serene place you call home. Very many different influences (too many to note) including being blown in the face one to many times by the exhaust of passing city buses has confused me. All this shit has made me dangerously deviate from my true path. Its funny how molded one can be by their surroundings. How suppressed ones talent can be by innocently being born into a family of buffoons. So this past weekend was spent at my place upstate with a girl I see (Jen) Shes one of the most gentle girls I have met. She and I met some guy while checking out the area that invited us to some Buddhist place. So early in the day today we visited a Zen Buddhist Monastery. It was located high in the mountains next to a cute town named Phoenicia. I love this cozy little town because it reminds me of the show South Park with a small strip of boutique stores surrounded by rolls of high and rugged mountains. This monastery stuff is damn weird I tell ya. Its definitely relaxing and all but I feel these people try a little too hard to be at one with themselves. I mean what the fuck? You had the obvious taking off of shoes and rampant bowing to one another. we spent 3 hours mostly sitting in a weird position with our legs, backs, necks and even our hands in a certain "Zen" formation. There was chanting and reading from a book. I kept thinking somebody should put these people onto something called marijuana. You can cut out all the incense and the ringing of bells and get to just about the same if not a deeper sense of "oneness". I do although feel oddly maybe even uncommonly relaxed today. Anyway I have never taken work more seriously than I have been recently and this is because of one simple reason. I need to finance my goal of owning and operating a farm with many acres somewhere between here and Buffalo which is some 350 miles north of NYC. Ahhh lots of open country land to explore. I'd love to have a few large dogs that harass the cows and goats in there cute playful way in the mornings. I think open wide country land is absolutely breathtaking and will contest with a sharp tongue anyone that says otherwise.. So getting back to my speeding train. It slooooowed down a bit. Things seem more euphoric.... Clear and brightly vivid.

Thursday, March 15, 2007


I dont care anymore for luxury cars. Ruggedness is what now appeals to me and so I'd to sell this beamer I drive. This is my soon to be new ride.

Tuesday, March 13, 2007

Current Events

Hmm, where shall I begin. I spent this last weekend upstate. I was hanging with a friend named Saber. Hes a cool guy that owns a big piece of property with a hotel that used to be in operation in the 20s. Hes 62 but hes cooler than anyone I know. The horses you see below are his. I had a great time relaxing @ my crib this past weekend and find that it gives me some sort of balance in the very hectic life that I lead. Im trying to bring my business up there as I simply cant stand this smog filled work camp we call NYC. I have a bitter outlook on the people here and see them as money hungry sheep who either forgot about or dont know that life should be about being happy and enjoying every minute as you do not know if you will be gone today or tomorrow. The business im in is driving me absolutely crazy. I hate it! The problem is that it produces alot of money and that is the only way I can finance my outdoor endeavors. Its a true dilemna. I cant stand dealing with people because quite honestly I dont like people. We are all selfish creatures. I was selfish when I left my exgirlfriend who trully needed and loved me. My other ex is selfish for leaving me at a time when I trulley needed her. I fucking hate that bitch for doing that to me! I am not an idiot and I know not to generalize but I feel that this one girl that looked me in the eye before jumping in front of the q train on 34th street figured something out before I did. I have made many changes in the past couple of weeks. I noticed I havent been doing things correctly. Our bodies need fine tuning and this is why i wake @ 5:30am everyday and run for an hour. I cant fucking stand incompetence. Only people with down syndrome should be allowed to procastinate. So I decided to venture off and check out the areas surrounding where I live. I ended up @ some party in Woodstock NY. Its a really artsy type of town with a bunch of up and coming artists that welcomed me as one of their own. I took notice to how open to meeting new people they are. they are very intersting people although not really for me (they, like lots of artists do alot of drugs). I've always been very friendly and approachable and so some girl by the name of Jaimie came and started to talk to me while I was having a beer. She told me she is a singer and in my head I pictured her singing in the mornings as I would love for my girlfriend or wife to do if of coarse she had a nice singing voice as Jaimie definately did. Its strange because there were 4 girls there for every guy and thats not typical here in NYC. I was telling her that I found I get along most with pisces and low and behold she was one. I found that to be eerily coincidental. She gave me her number introduced me to many of her artist friends and we chatted for a little while before I decided to go. Spring is in the air and you can smell it. Soon all the girls will be showing skin and flaunting their stuff. Its times like these that I pat myself on the back for staying single and keeping my options open. I pity those that are stuck in relationships and through their peripheral look at the cuties prancing around. My opinion is your born alone and yes you die alone. So for all you suckers stuck in a 6 foot hole, you either climb out soon or find your miserable self eaten up by the worms.


Friday, March 09, 2007

Stay Tuned... Dont Change The Channel!

I will be introducing you to a new sport I am creating called Extreme Green. This will entail taking vivid pictures in extreme yet breathtakingly beautiful locations around the globe. I cant think of any better reason to risk my life right now than to bring great freakin pics to you via my recreational endeavors. I will put my neck on the line to capture for your enjoyment the most amazing things I see while hiking, backpacking, atving, mtn biking etc. I kid you not, The above will be populated by stunning images. In the meantime prepare your sponge for some extreme shots I will take this weekend.

Sunday, March 04, 2007

Hudson Valley 3-4

I took this shot while sitting on my couch.

Encountering animals is quite different when they acknowledge your presence.

Not sure how much truth there is to this but i think being up here in the outback allows me to hone in on and prioritize certain issues. I am now just hanging on my couch.. I think im growing up. Things that seemed longer now seem shorter. Now, when I look down the block, I see down 5. The day used to drag and now it seems even tho I decide to wake earlier the day is too short. If there was more time more can get done! 2 hour drives that once seemed endless now pass fast. Although its been ten or eleven years with my respective crowd I can sum it all up in one week. I think im gonna just settle down...Seems to be the thing to do. I can totally see a cute wife and kid fitting into this country life. I think most would say this fuck you mentality I have isnt good public relations. I believe this is true. This is why I am not in politics. Also I dont think being a famous artist is any good either and if I was one I picture myself being like Eminem or the way Curt Kobain was. Like "yea thx for liking my stuff now go fuck urself". Because my house is so far up on top of a mountain whenever it rains locally it snows up here. The snow flakes are falling now and they are so big. It goes with out saying that I now know I will not live in or near the city when I marry and raise kids as my parents have decided to do with me. It will definately be somewhere beautiful like where I am now. Id like to go further north though toward Bufallo. I imagine there is alot of land just ready to be bought and developed up there . And their not gassed like some are here in hunter cause they think their close to NYC. Developing is the biz I would like to ultimately be in. I have to admit I feel like im strange because I havent taken any prospect seriously recently in terms of relationships. Im doing exactly what I always rememmber telling myself to do anticipating the next time I would have been single. Still though I feel like an outcast.